Have you ever thought about why you're single and lonely – have you ever considered that this shouldn't be the case – have you ever cried yourself to sleep believing you'll be alone forever? It's time to stop wondering because your ideal partner is out there, but how can they meet their perfect match while you sit at home wondering?

Is it the actual approach to asking for a date that worries you, or is it the fear of rejection that concerns you? These are the two fears you must overcome if you want to leave your lonely world. So why are you single and lonely – do you yearn for companionship?

So what if the opposite sex declines your invitation to a date? You are not alone. Many single and lonely people experience refusals and rejection, but they persevere until they strike gold. The good news about rejection is that you've just discovered that the person you liked isn't the one with whom you'll be settling down – and this isn't your ideal partner. You will experience heartbreak if you date the wrong person.

Is it the actual face-to-face approach that worries you? Stop worrying about trivial matters because there are many other options to free yourself from wondering why you are single and lonely.

Okay, if that's how you want it, keep your distance. If you believe your ideal partner is on the other side of the room, send a warm smile their way – if you get a smile in return, that's fine. Way to go! That's an excellent start because you have captured the attention of a perplexed individual who is now slightly unsure whether the smile is for them. They may approach you to inquire about the smile, and you can proceed from there. (Not in all cases will they come over.) Do the talking with your eyes – eye contact and a facial expression that says I am interested in you can work wonders for most people.

Don't be alarmed by some reactions you may receive from this approach. For example, what you may have thought was a good facial expression may come across like a pervert. So instead, experiment with different facial expressions in the mirror until you like what you see. Then, if you would go out with the person you see, why wouldn't anyone else?

If the prospect of being single and lonely bothers you, why not try the handwritten message strategy? Remember that there may be a glimmer of hope with the right words. Nothing too mushy, and no, I love you. It's a little too early for that. Comments like that will kill any chance you have. But, if you show enough interest in someone in the right way, you will get a reaction – it may not always be the one you want, but at least you will know where you stand.

They would not be lonely if only the lonely chose to mingle.